New F&F fic

[gwyn]

I've posted the new Fast and the Furious story, On Beds of Sorrow at my web site. Yes, this is the death story, but... see rant below, because to me, it's a lot more than just that, and I hate labels and this is why. It's a bit over 12,000 words. The title comes from a William Blake poem (And men are bound to sullen contemplation in the night: Restless they turn on beds of sorrow;) that I paraphrased in the story. The blurb for the story is on my main page, but even then it doesn't say much more than "features character death."

Why am I such a meanie? Well, because. I just am. (ETA: I just wanted to add that the reason I am ranting about labels isn't to passively-aggressively pick on anyone I know personally. It's just all about something that comes up every time I write something Sad with a capital S, and I like Sad, so I get it all the time. It's not nothin' personal to my peeps, 'cause they're my peeps, yo.) I hate labels, warnings, keywords, disclaimers, all of that craptastic nonsense that really got going with fandom on the web and quickly spread out of control. I'll spare you my rant against the uselessness of disclaimers and the stupidity of the other things, but the reason I hate labels like "deathfic" and like that is that it's so monumentally reductive and insulting to have a carefully crafted piece of fiction dismissed as one thing because it features that one theme or topic in it. Yes, I know, most people are not as talented as we might wish and do not have multiple layers in a story, or many people find labels helpful so they can avoid things they don't like, such as male pregnancy -- and yes, I know that with the thousands of people "writing" fanfic, labels might help people choose. I get that, I do. But they also dismiss and degrade the work, I believe, especially when there's much more to a story than just death or angst or non-con or whatever. A label just reduces fiction to its lowest common denominator, and I hate that. This story has so much more than just character death -- it's got a great Brian/Dom reunion full of lovey-dovey stuff, smut (69 smut!), a road trip (my favorite thing in the world), reVENge, Warpath!Dom, and postcards. Postcards! And lizards! (Not as many lizards as I'd hoped for, but it ended up not fitting as much, but still -- lizards!) But a label doesn't encompass those things, and that is why I hate them. So there. (I also find it weird that the people who often scream the loudest for reductive labels on fic are often the people who whine and moan if you "spoil" things even by something as simple as saying you liked it. I do not get why it's okay to spoil the story, but they'll scream bloody murder if you say anything about the show.) Death is the only thing I put a warning on, and that's only on the main page with the story blurbs -- and the only reason I do it is because my friends whine, and sometimes I even like my friends, so I defer to their phobias. Otherwise, you're on your own. ;-)

Comments

[maygra.livejournal.com]

I thought it was beautiful (and I was grateful for the warning). This kind of story, in this retrospective mode..not the kind of story that disturbs me...argh. I want to talk about the story but I'll do it privately beasue I really did like it. But this is...stories about grief don't bother me in the same ways that stories about death bother me, if that makes sense.

I thought you did an amazing job with this and I'm glad you posted it.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I sent you private mail back, but just wanted to say thanks here, too. It's funny, maybe I don't know what exactly constitutes death any more -- maybe the Balkanization of fandom has included all the definitions too! It never occurred to me that this wouldn't be just death, but could be something else. I do like the grief aspect -- I'm not interested in the physical death myself, as much, because I've been through it enough, but it might be more that the grief part is what I'm into the most. Never really thought much about it before!

[kriken.livejournal.com]

Beautifully written, hun. I've got this sad little smile on my face... You made me happy for them, even knowing the outcome.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Hey, a smile? Now THAT is unexpected and wonderful!

[phantomas.livejournal.com]

I am SO with you on the 'can't-stand-labels/warnings/disclaimers' feeling!

You said it very very well, thank you :)

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

The thing I hate most of all is ratings -- but it's not a good idea to get me started on that because the foam flies out of my mouth in a most unattractive fashion. ;-)

[phantomas.livejournal.com]

so in love with that icon *g*

Ratings are..kind of subjective, I've discovered -and there's nothing to do, people's sensibilities can't be taken into account, or everything would end up censored.

Oh well. *pictures you with foam flying*...interesting *ggg*

[mlyn.livejournal.com]

And lizards!

I thought those were new. *LOL*

And blowjobs while driving! That's one of my kinks.

Off to post...

[kadymae.livejournal.com]

Lyk, OMG gwyn, yur so meen! Kuz what if some1 reeds yur storey and seez that a charakter dyz, and iz lyk tramatized 4 eva?!

---

(Hope I made you laugh.)

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Snort!

[spasticat.livejournal.com]

It's funny how you posted this about "labels, warnings, keywords, disclaimers, all of that craptastic nonsense" because the other night I was pondering this subject. I came into fandom via Jossverse and watched as a story that at first began with a title, author, and pairing suddenly acquired disclaimers and warnings and other nonsense that far outweighed the content of the story. Gimme the story! ;)

I'm all about the surprise. But I understand people wanting to know this stuff. Yet I also understand that it can take away from the impact of the story. Or as you said, the reader doesn't even get to the story because they've dismissed it based on the label.

In popslash I see less with the disclaimers. Fic announcements are pretty basic and usually seem to only give a plot synopsis, pairing, and some form of rating like R or PG. It seems to be a fandom thing. The only time I usually see the flag of disclaimer raised is when it's mpreg.

Anyway, I'm wholeheartedly agreeing with you.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I just... ratings make me insane, but the rest of the stuff just adds to the whole infantalization of fandom quality that annoys me. When they turn into a half page of crap, then I lose it. The worst thing is that disclaimers are the most useless things ever -- they will not protect you from C&Ds, they will not help you in court, they do nothing at all and yet all the lemmings fall in line and put them up. For paragraphs and paragraphs. But the warnings... it's harder because so many people who do want the protection are people I like and respect, and it would be easy to just dimiss them as pussies or whatever, but they're smart people that I like. So I don't know what to do other than just warn for the worst thing and then continue on my merry way, annoying everyone and sundry.

One thing you might try

[maygra.livejournal.com]

Especially since you tend to post to your website, is a separate warning page. You link to it in the title...just a link to let people know there is a warning page if they want it -- if they are cool without it they'll skip it. If they feel the need, they'll click the link. I've thought about going back and retroactively fitting my HL fic like that...but the thing is so damned old..I don't think anyone who'd still read it, doesn't know. {g}

[spasticat.livejournal.com]

ratings make me insane, but the rest of the stuff just adds to the whole infantalization of fandom quality that annoys me

Infatnalization...very good point. I find a lot of the "pre" stuff to a fic to be too explanatory. There's no need for alll of that. Title, pairing, fandom, and a link to the fic, please. ;)

I'll admit it, though, I have a disclaimer on my main page that pretty much says all characters are owned by large corporate entities and that all is fiction. It's totally out of this naive belief that it means anything. Like you said, it doesn't. Totally done out of lemmingness. On my individual fic pages it just says, "the above is a work of fiction" which is all that really needs to be said. Though, who would think any of the fic is real?

In terms of protection, and just based on me, if there are no warnings as to specific content then I'm more likely to read the stories and enjoy them. Otherwise I might think twice and not get to experience something new and different. Teasers are fine, y'know, like the ones for a book. Those I don't mind. Even a little backstory is a-okay. But there was one list I was on that had at least ten items you had to put before your fic if you wanted to post it. Yikes!

And now on to the serious stuff ...

[kadymae.livejournal.com]

Wow.

I liked the structure of the story immensely. Bam. First paragraph. Brian is dead. And then the slashbacks of how the relationship had come together and grown.

Your Vengance!Dom is wonderfully calculating and scary. He's had the hot flare of wrath and worked through it into something much darker. A banked fire waiting for that gust of air to make it go hwoom!

The conclusion of bringing us back to the beginning was beautiful. I loved the use of desert images and the fact that Dom has worked through his grief. Brian is gone and he is not and you pick up the pieces and keep stepping through. And you still love and you don't forget. You just have to keep moving.

Re: And now on to the serious stuff ...

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Thank you! That really is what I wanted to do, have the "slashbacks" (what a great phrase!) showing their relationship, and then a story about Dom and what has changed for him, what he's learned through this love. I like dealing with enormous changes, I guess, and finding out what characters have inside of them.

[labgirl2076.livejournal.com]

*sighs*

omg....this was so sad it made me cry. but it was worth it since it was utterly beautiful. i don't even think i would classify it as death fic. it's just amazing. thank you!

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I'm actually starting to wonder if I don't know what qualifies death and what qualifies as grief! Maybe I'm so out of the fannish loop that I'm calling it the wrong kind of story, but regardless, I definitely am glad that you liked it, and found something worthwhile in it.

[lierdumoa.livejournal.com]

Lovely story! I can't really think of one specific thing I liked about it, but it was just lovely all around.

Two of my favorite HP fic have character death in them. I can't say the same for any of my other fandoms, but I don't usually shy away from any sort of fic, including deathfic. I love angst. Well written angst just does it for me. In some cases, the only good way to end an angst fic is with death. I prefer if the story ends happily, but if death is the only ending that makes any sort of sense, I'm not going to complain.

I think for me this was more of a coping fic than a death fic. By which I mean I felt the same about it as I do fic in which a main character is, say, permanently paralyzed from the waist down or goes blind and the story centers on that character and their friends, family, etc. having to cope.

Have you already posted this to quarter_mile? Are you going to? If not, I'll go over there and recc it.



Also, check your e-mail. I sent the vid. It's approx. 23 MB.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I got your mail! I sent it on to my friend and I'm hoping I can go over and watch it, but if not, I will try to go to my dad's and see it tomorrow, if that's okay timing for you?

I'm glad you liked it -- I'm glad that people are willing to give it a chance and not get scared away. God knows I loved writing it, I really did. And I'm really enjoying your character meme -- I might have to give it a try myself!

[lierdumoa.livejournal.com]

Tomorrow's fine! Thanks for looking at it for me.

[mlyn.livejournal.com]

Two of my favorite HP fic have character death in them.

OOO! Which ones? I don't read a ton in the HP fandom but I heavily worship a handful of writers, and some of them (er, all?) have written character death or grief.

[lierdumoa.livejournal.com]

Julad (http://www.livejournal.com/users/julad/)'s Night-blooming Heartsease (http://yearningvoid.net/stories/julad/000080.html)

Maya (http://www.livejournal.com/users/mistful/)'s Dark Side of Light (http://www.lasairandmaya.com/mayafic/) (about halfway down the page)

[firstgold.livejournal.com]

I read "On Beds of Sorrow" because it was rec'd to me by mlyn. Other than her TFatF fics, I haven't read anything in that fandom, and this fic just blew me away.

These were the bones of loss, memories and regrets so stark white and brittle, lying scattered on their beds of sorrow. Something once formed in the shape of a person, of love. In the end they would be scoured and buried by the sand of time blowing in on a desert wind.

You use such powerful imagery, and by the end of this, I was was all teary-eyed.

And I totally hear you on the labelling of fic thing. I like my fic Sad with a capital S too, and this story was just everything that I could have ever asked for and more in an intelligent and emotional fic.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Thank you -- I'm glad you were willing to give it a try. We Sad lovers have to stick together!

[firstgold.livejournal.com]

Definitely!

*hangs fist in gesture of grief and solidarity*

[(Anonymous)]

This is a beautiful story, beautifully written. Love the images you've conjured up. I could feel the intensity of Dom's pain. I'm glad you wrote this and I'm glad I read it! (Although, I was a little apprehensive at first,with your warnings and all). Anyone who passes this by, is really missing something special.
Thanks!!!!
Catty

[(Anonymous)]

This is a beautiful story, beautifully written. Love the images you've painted. I could feel the intensity of Dom's pain. I'm glad you wrote this and I'm glad I read it! (Although, I was a little apprehensive at first,with your warnings and all). Anyone who passes this by, is really missing something special.
Thanks!!!!
Catty

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Thank you, Catty! I knew people would be apprehensive, but I also feared worse fallout from not talking about it and warning. But I'm really glad you gave it a read and that you enjoyed it after all.

[quitesparkly.livejournal.com]

This fic is so beautifully written. I don't really know what I feel. Sad, that's for sure. And love. I love this fic. I feel the love Brian had for Dom and how much Dom loves Brian. And also the love you have for Dom/Brian. I'm very happy that you wrote this fic despite some fans are greatly against deathfic. Personally I care less about deathfic, I just want to feel the emotions between the characters and throughout the stories. You got it right. You made us feel the sadness, grief, loss and emptiness that Dom had. And we grieve with him, ache for him and Brian.

I'm glad that I'm into this small fandom to read those beautiful stories written by those talented writers. Thanks again.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you! That really is what it was about -- how much they love each other. I know it sounds weird, but there's something about loss and grief that allow you to really get into what makes love last past that, and that's what I want to play with. I'm all about the love, and the more operatic and grand, the better. Because I truly do love the guys.

[paris7am.livejournal.com]

mori307 wrote, I feel the love Brian had for Dom and how much Dom loves Brian. And also the love you have for Dom/Brian.
Yes! exactly.

An incredible story and an incredible experience to read. *Much* love and thanks to you for writing it.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Aw, thank you!! Well, considering how besotted I am with them, it's not hard to want to take it a step further and go to really operatic lengths. I just love them being in love, you know?

[dine.livejournal.com]

I admit to tearing up by the end of reading this - but they were exactly the right sort of tears.

I'm madly in love with Dom&Brian, but this story actually expanded on that love - Dom's grief made their relationship feel that much solider, and the way he processed (or didn't) his loss felt very Dom-like to me. seeking revenge was perfectly in character, but I was quite happy that he stopped short - I would have been disappointed in a way if he had followed through with his initial plan.

you quite surprised me when the Feds arrived - I guess I hadn't thought that one through, although it made perfect sense, and some sort of justice was received in the end for Brian.

in your hands, these guys always wow me. thanks for providing something a bit different!

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, that's really what I like about writing the death or grieving stuff -- using it as a way to showcase how much they did love each other, how much it meant as a life-changing revelation kind of thing. For me, too, it was a way to show just how much loving Brian changed Dom -- there's no real indication of that in the movie, but I like to think of him as having changed a *lot* from knowing Brian, and vice versa. And sometimes the only way you can see that is if one of them is gone.

Plus, you know, I only believe in heaven for fictional characters. Then I imagine them reunited eventually, on their fluffy little clouds.

[midnytebloodlus.livejournal.com]

I am just going to comment on this story. This was so lovely and i admit made me cry. The grief was palpable and i am happy how you ended it.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank you so much for letting me know, and for giving it a shot. It's just so wonderful to know that it's still getting read, and I really appreciate you letting me know.