At least it's sunny and warm

[gwyn]

I haven't had a cold in about two to three years. I think I had a minor sore throaty cold last year, but it was so insignificant and short that I don't even remember. Because of my lengthy history of lung troubles, I get a flu shot every year, and I'm pretty much Howard Hughes with the handwashing during cold season or when I'm around people who have been sick.

So of course the one time I don't need a cold more than any other time in my life, I get one on my visit to take care of my sister in chemotherapy. Naturally. I had cough from hell yesterday, and now the throat is so sore I can hardly swallow, and my skin hurts, which always means I am sick. And Sis_r has this panicked look in her eye because she's terrified of getting sick on top of all this, with her reduced immune system. I feel like I should pay the extra money to go home early so she can stop being afraid.

I think outside of that, though, I've been something of a help to her. So much has been left undone, despite help from her friends, and I think it's pretty nice for her to know there's someone who can clean up the cat vomit in the middle of the night or lift heavy things.

We spent the entire day at the clinic for the chemo. They apparently gave her a lower dose the first time, and hit her with a much harder shot this time. We had the nicest possible bonus at the clinic, though. You go into a room with three reclining chairs that the gynecological cancer patients kick back in while they're getting the chemicals. And when we came in, there was a couple already in there, both of whom volunteer for the companion animal training organization down here, and they had a four-month-old golden retriever puppy wth her little blue training jacket on, fast asleep on the floor. It made my sister so much happier, she just lit up. The man let my sister hold her for long periods of time while she slept. One of the things I really do love about Evil Twin is that she is a volunteer for the Humane Society animal rescue group here in San Diego. Last year in the terrible fires she put her life seriously at risk going up into the burning areas to get animals out of danger, and then worked in the holding areas trying to get them back to their owners. She's done this for a few years now; I have a great picture of her rescuing a lama (lamalama!) from a few years ago. So China, the little puppy, made what is really turning out to be a painful experience for her so much better -- if China flunks out of companion animal school, she'll have done one great thing in her life by making a very sad and fearful person feel infinitely better.

Sis_r's hair is coming out like crazy now, and I keep catching her sobbing. The hair loss is the big thing for her, the worst thing, but I also think what it means is that's the obvious aspect of what's happening to her and so it's making this all so much more real and sad. She's really struggling with pain -- sometimes so severe that I'm scared I need to call the hospital. And she looks like a bent-over old woman from the weight loss, the surgery, the way her skin is changing because of the chemicals. It's breaking my heart.

But she's also really trying to keep a positive outlook. Her friends are wonderful to her, and that's making such a difference. I wish I wasn't adding to her stress by being sick. But at least I can make up for it by doing stuff around the house. I have a feeling that the whole weekend is going to be just mostly here, but in the backyard there's a bottlebrush plant in bloom (I want one of those so bad but they say you can't grow them in my area) with gorgeous birds flitting around, all her hibiscus plants are in bloom and they're stunning, the lantana's blooming, and other plants I don't even know. I wish klia was here to tell me what kinds of birds I'm seeing. And it's hot and sunny, which is a nice alternative to the rainy cold we've had in Seattle of late.

On the plane down I got some ideas of ways to handle the next chapter of Measure of a Man, which was good because I didn't know how to do what I wanted and finally realized I'd have to give up that plan, and now have an alternative. And I want to try to write some of that down, and also get more of the F&F fic I've already got 10,000 words on (movies_michelle, did you get that section okay?). Sis_r has a laptop and wi-fi, so I get to sit out back if I want or watch TV and be online and write. Yay! Now, if I could just stop coughing!

Comments

[ehann.livejournal.com]

I know you don't know me, but I hope your sis hangs in there. Blessed be.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Thank you! And hello ::waves::

[umbo.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry you're sick! If you're really worried about your sister, maybe you could get a couple masks and wear them along with all the hand washing. I'm glad the puppy was there--it sounds like she really appreciated it. And I'm sure she really appreciates your being there.

*hugs*

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, the worst part is that we're both really sick and just lying around the house like a couple of invalids. And I was sick before I knew I was -- so I'm terrified I gave it to her before we realized I actually had a nasty cold. But at least I have enough strength to take care of the cats and stuff.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I think one of the hardest things for her has been to give up her animal rescue duties. She's really jonesing for pets, and is just loving on her cats to the Nth degree.

[paratti.livejournal.com]

((((Hugs))))

[reginaspina.livejournal.com]

I hope your sister has a speedy recovery. (And I think the companion animal/hospital visits by puppies etc. programs are so fabulous!) Best wishes to both of you!

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I keep hoping that she might have her next treatment at the same time as the woman with China. That would be so cool, and I know would make her feel better -- the next few treatments are going to be tough. She's really starting to feel it, and so having the puppy there would be so wonderful.

[reginaspina.livejournal.com]

She's really starting to feel it, and so having the puppy there would be so wonderful.

Will keep my fingers crossed! And I hope regardless of puppy that your sister's treatment goes well, but obviously, it would be better to have the pup there!

[cy-girl.livejournal.com]

Too bad there isn't a golden retriever on staff at the chemo center permanently. Or a couple of cats.

Is your sister feeling well enough to go wig shopping?

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

She went to a specialty place that makes really expensive wigs because they look more natural, and apparently they get it started, but you have to lose all your hair first because they fit it close to the head. So that length of time is not something she's looking forward to, but I know she's not really keen on being bald for a year.

[cy-girl.livejournal.com]

Bald for a year? Oh, dear.

[klia.livejournal.com]

Oh no, what a time for a cold! It's no wonder, considering the stress you've been under, but still... argh!

I feel so bad for your sis and what she's having to endure, and what you're going through with her.

The puppy -- what a godsend! I wish she could have one with her during every treatment!

I wish klia was here to tell me what kinds of birds I'm seeing.

I'm really touched that you thought of me. This time of year, during fall migration, it's possible you're seeing some exotic, non-native species down there in SD, which is exciting. Just relax and enjoy them, and let them distract you for a while.

::hugs::

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Exotics! I'm all about that. I wish I could see the hummers enough to see their colors, because we really only get the Anna's in Seattle, and I'd love to see more. One of the birds I like most is magpies, which I know people think is crazy, but we don't have magpies! So I think they're beautiful. And the plants are so cool -- I walked around the neighborhood tonight, and all the oleanders and other plants really appealed to me. I wish you could be here to see them, though I'd wager a lot of the things i think are cool would be old house to you.

[klia.livejournal.com]

I wish you could be here to see them, though I'd wager a lot of the things i think are cool would be old house to you.

Oh, no, not at all! Northern CA is more like Seattle than southern CA in that regard, so we only Anna's, too. I love magpies and all corvids, and we don't have them, either. So, while exotics are cool, everything in CA is still pretty exotic to me, even though I've been here 8 years, and it all still excites me.

[mystic-savage.livejournal.com]

Oh Jesus. You probably got it from me. I'm so sorry. I didn't notice I was sick until Sunday, and at least I had the good sense not to come over then, but you probably got it Saturday. Crap. Crap Crap Crap. I apologize to both of you.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Don't feel guilty -- I doubt it was you, because we never really had any contact at group, so I can't imagine how I'd have caught it from you. I'm sure it was probably at work or something.

[rainkatt.livejournal.com]

I'm so sorry you got sick. That just makes it all harder. But how nice that the dog was there, and could help your sister cope. There's something so wonderful about animals in a place like that; I've always thought it was too bad they couldn't be part of the regular "staff."

I haven't been commenting much over here, but I've been thinking about you and your sister. I hope that she's able to get through this OK. It sounds as though she's got lots of support, and it's great you can be there for her.

Feel better. ::Hugs::

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I would love it if she was able to time her next treatment to the time of the companion volunteer couple. I think it would make one of the worst ones more bearable -- I think the next two are going to be pretty rough on her.

[jwaneeta.livejournal.com]

Glad the puppy was there to make your sister feel a little better. You're both in my thoughts and prayers. I hope the cold takes a left turn and leaves you alone, but it's still wonderful that you're there for her -- it's got to be a big comfort.

Glad to hear you've got an idea for Measure of a Man -- it's a great story.

All my best to you both.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

We've been a couple of pathetic invalids for the whole weekend. She had a pretty bad day yesterday and I spent a lot of it conked out on the chair when I wasn't running errands for her. Mostly I'm just terrified she'll get this too on top of already feeling like death, but I'm going to keep my fingers crossed.

[fishsanwitt]

::hugs:: and best wishes for both of you.

[mlyn.livejournal.com]

Puppy! What luck for Sis_r. Sounds like she and I have puppy-love in common, too.

How much more chemo does your sis have? I'll be keeping her in my thoughts per usual.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

This was her second of six. She goes in every three weeks. I think the next few will be the killers.

She was really touched by your card, and wanted you to know how much she appreciated it. She got all sniffly. It means a lot to her that I have all my friends interested in her recovery.

[mlyn.livejournal.com]

At least there's an end in sight. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for her in a few weeks. And I'm really glad the card was so well received. I wasn't sure if she'd think I was some anonymous weirdo horning in on this personal experience, so it's nice to hear this result.

[namastenancy.livejournal.com]

Oh, Gwyn- what a heartbreaker! What's your sister's first name? I'd like to light a candle for her and say a prayer. My heart goes out to both of you.

take care
blessings be
namaste SF Nancy