gwyn: (willow pronoun)
[personal profile] gwyn
What’s this? A usage post? You mean she’s finally gone back to doing something useful instead of talking about her stupid life or her stupid fic or that homo car movie? Oui, oui, I have. But it’s a small one this time.

No doubt, if you’ve written an essay for an English class or written fic that a marginally competent beta has edited, you’ve probably come across the term parallelism — as in someone complaining that your sentence isn’t parallel enough. And if you’re like most people, you’re thinking, WTF? Because of course our mind immediately goes off to geometry and we think of two lines running parallel to one another, and what does that have to do with writing?

Actually, a surprising amount. If you have two or more ideas that are similar — or parallel — to each other, they should be written in a parallel grammatical form if you want to craft your most effective sentence. Single words should be balanced with single words, phrases with phrases, clauses with clauses... you get the idea. Diana Hacker in A Writer’s Reference uses these excellent examples:

A kiss can be a comma, a question mark, or an exclamation point. — Mistinguett
This novel is not to be tossed lightly aside, but to be hurled with great force. — Dorothy Parker
In matters of principle, stand like a rock; in matters of taste, swim with the current. — Thomas Jefferson


What you can see in these is that the writers chose a way of expressing their thoughts where each element is like the other. Sometimes when you’re trying to express a thought, just getting it down on paper is hard enough, let alone having it sound elegant and parallel. But if you go back and look at your work later, you can often see where these balances can be struck. Parallelism doesn’t always show its face right away (which unfortunately with fanfic means it doesn’t often get used because of that bizarre rush to postthisstoryrightnowOMGbabieswilldieifitdoesn’tgouprightthissecond!!!), so stepping back and then looking at a sentence later can help you see how to make it parallel.

When you have a series of parallel ideas, you want to balance them out to help your reader along. Text is more awkward to read when the items in a sentence violate the the reader’s expectation that they’ll be phrased similarly.

Vampires commonly exhibit the following characteristics: amorality, deadliness, speed, strength, and they are sensitive to light photosensitivity.
Here you want to keep all of these similar one-word descriptions the same, as much as possible. (When you need to break parallelism because you can’t find a suitable way of expressing something so it stays the same, it’s considered best to use your odd element at the end of the list.)

At the Magic Box, Anya is responsible for stocking items, ringing up sales, and signatures signing for deliveries.
This keeps everything with the –ing form for the verbs.

After taking the keys from Brian, Dom drove down the wrong side of the road, ran a red light, and went through two stop signs.
You want to add that verb in there at the end to make the three things parallel: drove, ran, went through.


When you’re pairing ideas, you can make their connection clearer by expressing them in similar grammatical form. This is often what people are criticizing when they tell you that your sentences aren’t parallel. Paired ideas are usually connected thusly: 1) with a coordinating conjunction like and, but, or or; 2) with a pair of correlative conjunctions like either...or or not only... but also; or 3) with a word introducing the comparison, such as than or as.

Coordinating conjunctions link ideas of equal importance, so you’ll see things like and, but, or, nor, for, so, and yet here. If the ideas are parallel in content, people expect you to put them that way grammatically, too:

At Sunnydale High, magic can result in suspension or being expelled expulsion from school.
The government is reducing the budget for interplanetary travel and cut cutting the Stargate exploration program.

The correlative constructions can be a bit trickier, and these often trip up even experienced writers. What you want to check here is that the second half of the sentence matches the first:

The flying broom was not only too long but also was too wide, Ron thought.
Here, repeating the “was” creates an unbalanced sentence, since “too long” comes right after “not only” — so you want “too wide” to come directly after “but also.”

Fraser was instructed either to get a cab or to walk into town.
Here you’re using the word “to” in front of “get a cab,” so you want to make sure that the second idea, walking to town, has that “to” in front of it as well.

The hardest one may be comparisons, where you’ll see “than” or “as” used to compare elements. More people seem to experience trouble with this one than with any other parallelism concept:

Illyria finds it easier to deal with Wesley than talking to talk to anyone else at Wolfram and Hart.
No one could convince Ezra that giving is as much a joy as to receive receiving.

For a lot of you, this stuff just won’t come naturally. The act of writing at all can be hard enough, and throwing something refined like parallelism in can make it even tougher (ack! the burden!). But the extra step of crafting parallel sentences can be worth it in terms of making things easier and just plain nicer for your readers — and then, too, you might not have to listen to smug betas telling you that you lack parallelism.

Date: 2004-12-03 10:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] umbo.livejournal.com
Yay new usage post, although I certainly have no objection to your other posts!

Date: 2004-12-03 10:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] movies-michelle.livejournal.com

Thanks for the post!

I know this is going to sound strange, but parallelism is something I actually enjoy correcting when I'm proofreading student papers. I don't know, it's weirdly kind of fun for me.

Date: 2004-12-03 10:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tir.livejournal.com
It's one of my favorites, too.

Date: 2004-12-03 10:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] viverra-libro.livejournal.com
All bow to the instructive grammar lady!

Now if you would please disseminate some info on the proper use of homonyms (and I know these aren't all properly called homonyms, but for the purpose of internet writing, I think they're close), I would happily kiss your toes! In the last week, I've seen: your/you're, breath/breathe, slack/slake, and prostate/prostrate.

Date: 2004-12-03 12:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
Go here
http://www.livejournal.com/tools/memories.bml?user=gwyn_r&keyword=usage+posts&filter=all

and there are two posts devoted just to homonyms/homophones and they appear in various guises in other posts as well.

Date: 2004-12-03 10:42 am (UTC)
fishsanwitt: (Default)
From: [personal profile] fishsanwitt
Oh, I'd never be a *smug* beta :) ::smugs away:: I'm kidding, in case you didn't get that :)

This was very interesting. Thank you. I got a little lost with the conjunctions, but I did understand it overall.

This is going to join the rest of your grammar posts in my memories.

Date: 2004-12-03 10:53 am (UTC)
ext_281: (Default)
From: [identity profile] the-shoshanna.livejournal.com
Like a couple of other commenters, I too enjoy correcting faulty parallelism -- it's just so . . . tidy.

I see these kinds of errors constantly in professionally published stuff, too.

Date: 2004-12-03 10:56 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sisabet.livejournal.com
I did not know what this was called. I mean - I knew what is was on an intuitive level - but not that it was an actual *thing* with a name that we could talk about and discuss and and and - wow. I really need to pay attention to parallelism.

My education should not have been this inadequate. I swear I went to college. I wrote tons of papers and received good grades. Those Bitches! Of course - I was a psych major with an emphasis on neurology, so maybe that is how I missed it?

Date: 2004-12-03 12:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I'm not surprised -- I don't think it's addressed much at all in school and even then, they may not really get into it as a subject per se. Like, they might say "you need to make this sentence parallel" but they don't tell you that parallelism is an actualy subject in usage. Like I said, it's a fairly refined concept, and one that I think doesn't get addressed because the focus is almost always on the basics.

Date: 2004-12-03 11:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kadymae.livejournal.com
But, Gwyn, you still talk about that homo car movie.

;)

Thank goodness.

Date: 2004-12-03 01:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I... I can't help it! It's an illness!

Date: 2004-12-03 03:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bogwitch.livejournal.com
These posts always terrify me, but I think this is something that I do instictively, because the sentence will never sound 'right' when it's rhythm is off.

Date: 2004-12-04 12:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kumi.livejournal.com
I'm late in the party :(

Happy belated birthday! Hope you had a wonderful day.

Date: 2004-12-04 02:19 am (UTC)
kathyh: (Kathyh reading)
From: [personal profile] kathyh
Thanks for this. I think it's something I've always been able to hear in my head without actually knowing what it was called. I'm quite pleased to know that my instincts are correct.

If we were taught any of this at school I have totally forgotten it!

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