gwyn: (Default)
[personal profile] gwyn
I'm in a monstrously grumptastic mood today, and one of the things I was thinking about this morning while grumbling through getting ready for work is how annoyed I am by the disappearance of conversation in my fannish life, how few people want to actually talk about anything and how the disparity between the fannish consumer and the fannish producer has grown even more pronounced and how much I hate that (the idea that because someone isn't a writer or vidder they have no intrinsic value sends me into a frenzy of anger), and mostly, how much I resent the fact that I have no more shows to review. That was the defining thing for me in starting this LJ: the chance to write the meta, generate discussion (even if sometimes the discussions haven't been pleasant), review and critique and dissect, and I have nothing to do that with anymore. Because of the asshat executives who cancelled both Firefly and Angel, the best shows -- the Jossverse -- for reviews are gone, and there is nothing currently airing that I either enjoy, or that is the kind of show worth reviewing. Much as I love Gilmore Girls, for instance, it's not a reviewy show the way Buffy, Angel, and Firefly were for me.

I don't like Lost (mark my words, JJ Abrams will only bring you heartache and misery) and only endure it for Naveen Andrews, and even with Alias and some new eps of Spooks/MI-5 and 24 coming up, I doubt there will really be anything reviewy there either. The only things I've had the slightest passing interest in this year are Kevin Hill (watchable solely for the luscious Taye Diggs), and Veronica Mars, but it doesn't always hold my interest, and isn't so far a review the next day type show. I miss the discussion, the analysis, the whole... fun of picking things apart and looking for deeper meanings. It makes me grumpy that I haven't got anything like that. The Shield will also be coming up, but... they lost me a while ago and now I watch more out of loyalty than anything. I loathe and despise the crime procedurals with the white hot fury of a thousand burning suns, but have to watch the despicable and cretinous CSI:NY for my favorite actor, Gary Sinise. The only procedural I give a crap about is Without a Trace and it's more a tribute to that cast and the personal storylines than anything else.

The best things are all on pay cable, which I can't afford. I will be waiting for the S2 discs of Dead Like Me, for a while, I'm sure, but look forward to seeing it; can't wait to watch Carnivale on something better than the horrible rainbowed dark and murky tapes we saw first season on, and eagerly await the ability to view the second season. The idea of more Deadwood is thrilling, too. But none of these are shows I can sink teeth into because I often won't see them for months and months and months after they air. One of my favorite discoveries so far is The Wire. I really like this series and am only to episode 5. I wish I'd had the chance to watch this series as it aired; it would have been interesting to review, especially because I have no idea half the time what's happening. I can't keep about 2/3 of the characters straight, and especially the different gang street wars confuse me, as do the relationships of the hateful, venal cops that McNulty battles with. (Plus, crime! While I'm writing a crime-based WIP, it's enormously helpful as research material.)

But when I get what's going on, what a wing-ding of a show it is. It's also one of the few shows I've seen that deals with homosexuality on a fairly realistic basis and challenges assumptions about its acceptance in these very tough, often discriminatory worlds. Not they don't also play it for a little prurient interest, as well, but it's fairer than most other shows could hope to be. Omar, the one criminal character who seems to be on opposite sides of the Barksdale group, in particular fascinates me: his elaborate cornrows and his cool facial scar; his obvious tender love of his boyfriend in a world where a homosexual man is most decidedly not welcome; his sarcastic wit and wary perspicacity; his amusing idiosyncracies such as not wanting his boyfriend to swear because it's uncouth and his friendliness to the cops... I could watch him alone on this show and be happy. I've never seen a young black male character, especially a drug-dealing homicidal thug, portrayed like this, and I'm mesmerized not just by the role but by the actor (and his boyfriend, as well). I have a bad feeling subsequent episodes will bring bad things for him, but I'm enjoying these, anyway.

I also like the lesbian cop McNulty works with, whose name totally escapes me right now. The actress is up and down, not always on top of the role, but the character has a really unusual background and relationships with people that I've never seen before, especially when most shows would just have her be the dyke cop in the background. Anyway, I have quite a few more S1 discs to get through, and am looking forward to seeing Aiden Gillen when he arrives. But this is the first show that feels rich enough in characters and story arcs to be a review-worthy outside of Deadwood, but like Deadwood, I'm seeing these so much later that I never have the chance to get down and dirty with them. I miss that, a lot. Most of the time I don't miss the grind of movie reviewing, but sometimes I do, and have been feeling the loss of writing my little post-ep TV reviews in LJ a lot this fall. The Wire is definitely a series worth that kind of attention. I'm almost thinking of investing in the discs becuase it would make such a great vidding show, as well, but I'll have to think about that.

Date: 2004-12-28 10:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jackiekjono.livejournal.com
Cheer up! Just two more weeks and all of the January shows start! There is one that looks promising a that seems to be a Baretta rip-off. There's another one that seems to be some sort of horror pastiche with lots of nifty effects. Yippee!

Is it weird that I'm more excited about the January shows starting than I was about Christmas in Vegas?

Date: 2004-12-29 05:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
Of course, I'm also the kiss of death for shows, so if there are some good Jan. shows, I'm terrified I will jinx them by falling for them!

Date: 2004-12-28 10:38 pm (UTC)
ext_841: (Default)
From: [identity profile] cathexys.livejournal.com
y'know...i've been trying to put my finger on what has change on my flist, and part of it is that people move to different fandoms and part is that i have a lot of folks friended just b/c of my flocked journal whom i'm not really that intersted in..but it wasn't untill reading your post just now that i realized that the actual show discussions are missing...i mean, i like reading them even if i'm not a huge fan of the show (well, except for lost :-) but there is very little left...we so need a wheedon show :-) or at least something to combine us in a way that certain shows did..even if you weren't reading/writing in it, you more than likely watched it (i always think of XF and BtVS as two such shows...)

i'm watching SV, VM, and CSI every week, but none of them make me wanna write (well, SV sometimes...)

Date: 2004-12-29 05:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
Yeah... I mean, it's not that people didn't comment on Buffy or Angel with one or two lines of OMG I lvoed it! or something. But in general I felt there was more going on there than currently, and I also find that the larger fandom has become, the less conversation happens. The writers are all busy churning out their drabbles by the pound, and everything is directed toward feedbacking them; LJ isn't conducive to lengthy conversational threads... I dunno. I just am missing that whole environment. There's a lot of volume, but it all just sounds like static at times.

Date: 2004-12-30 12:57 am (UTC)
ext_67382: (EyeHorus)
From: [identity profile] moonchildetoo.livejournal.com
I miss it too.

When LJ arrived, it quickly became Flavor of the Month as far as online fandom, and pretty much sounded the death knell for the heyday of regular ol' Yahooish discussion lists, which I think is a shame. There functions that a list fills that journals don't - primarily, it's a whole lot easier and less time consuming to respond to detailed discussions on a list. You can also choose to receive the posts in more than one way, and you don't have to go hunting for them (unless you want to).

I enjoyed multi-fandom/non fandom-specific lists which discussed fandom and slashdom in general, but they've pretty much disappeared - if not literally disappeared, then gone totally dead because of the stampede to journaling. I for one would welcome a comeback of such lists.

Yes - so very much of fandom these days is based around how much can you produce, how fast can you get a story out there, etc. There really are just consumers and producers, and the consumers don't seem to want to do anything but consume - there is precious little discussion of a fandom's characters, plots, relationships, etc. - the sort of discussion that encourages me to write. I've never been able to write in a vacuum, so if I have no discussion, I have no drive to write.

I am a writer (at least, I have written, though never prolifically), but I've written comparatively few stories and each takes me a while. That's just the sort of writer I am, it doesn't come easily to me, as far as motivation, energy and flow. The fandom I was most prolific in was when I was involved in the most discussion. As fannish discussion in general has dried up, so has my desire to write, because part of the kick I get out of writing is in the sharing/discussing, and it ain't happenin'.

It's also my opinion that in Days of Olde pre-Onelist, Yahoogroups, etc., when there were very few online discussion lists, period, because you had to run all the list software yourself, people appreciated the sense of community and maybe were more tolerant of various opinions and personalities because they wanted to be able to play in the pond. They stuck it out and continued because they enjoyed the feeling of belonging. When lists became a dime a dozen and you could start one in five minutes, anyone who had a momentary snit could start their own list, yadda, yadda, and there are now just too many lists, blogs, web sites, etc. and not enough fans to creating a good active talk-base. Sigh...

Will stop rambling now.

Date: 2004-12-30 04:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I'm glad you did ramble -- becuase you're one of the few people who's agreed with me! I think it's just that a lot of folks don't have anything different to compare to. I came in to fandom when it was on the cusp of changing from a print culture to a web culture. I love the 'net and what it's brought us. But there just isn't any getting around the fact that it's also made us an instant gratification, disconnected, conversationless mass. You don't have to be involved to be a fan anymore; previously, you did. But more than anything, I think, I just miss the *recent* conversations that sprang up in the jossverse. His shows transcended the limitations of the disconnectedness we have now, and brought larger groups together for more discussion than you get with most fandoms. I was very spoiled the last two years. I'm really seeing that now, as it's gone away.

Date: 2004-12-31 01:33 am (UTC)
ext_67382: (Default)
From: [identity profile] moonchildetoo.livejournal.com
I came in to fandom when it was on the cusp of changing from a print culture to a web culture. I love the 'net and what it's brought us. But there just isn't any getting around the fact that it's also made us an instant gratification, disconnected, conversationless mass.

I began to get involved in fandom just before/as home computers were starting to be affordable and more people were coming online, but my early fandom experience was firmly grounded in the zine/apa/paper blog culture, and in the fannish mentoring culture. The latter, I really miss. I know it still occurs online, but in person is just...better. More fulfilling.

I think the Buffyverse, like XFiles, appealed to a lot of people on a lot of levels. There was a lot of 'meat' there, much more than in the usual television show. Joss went deep, and all sorts of people appreciated that.

Date: 2004-12-28 11:05 pm (UTC)
kathyh: I made this (Kathyh English)
From: [personal profile] kathyh
and mostly, how much I resent the fact that I have no more shows to review.

I do know what you mean. From a British point of view I would say that Spooks/MI5 this season is fascinating for various reasons so I wouldn't write it off. We've also been lucky enough to see Battlestar Galactica first and I'd highly recommend that. Nothing has quite made up for the loss of the Jossverse though...

Date: 2004-12-29 05:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I'm looking forward to the MI-5 eps. But... Tom! Ack! Though it will be nice to finally have a chance to see them after hearing so much.

Date: 2004-12-28 11:18 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] viverra-libro.livejournal.com
There is a sense of being adrift, isn't there? I am no longer anchored by my weekly TV schedule -- there is nothing really to look forward to, and I just aimlessly drift, flipping through the channels. I'm trying to make that a good thing, by looking into other fandoms and non-TV-related pastimes (noooooo!), but it's kind of lonely. The only things I watch now are on FX - Nip/Tuck, The Shield, and Rescue Me (with the strangely attractive Dennis Leary), but they seem to only run one at a time, and the schedules are erratic.

I haven't seen Lost yet, but last week I read what appears to be the single best piece of lotrips fic in existence (because everything I've read since then has been rather disappointing), and am going to watch on Wednesday to see Dom. Are you going to watch, too, despite your forebodings?

Date: 2004-12-29 05:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I watched Lost since the beginning, but... I don't share the love everyone i know has for it. Except Naveen... I've been hot for him for years. It's weird, I feel like I'm looking at a nekkid emperor or something, and I cannot see the cool new threads everyone else sees. I find it contrived and boring and too coy for it's own good. Maybe someone can hypnotize me at Escapade and make me see what everyone else sees. Becuase it certainly seems like THE fannish program right now. I used to know the days of the week by what was on the previous night. Now half the time I can't remember what day it is!

Date: 2004-12-28 11:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maubast.livejournal.com
Jumping around a little bit:

but have to watch the despicable and cretinous CSI:NY for my favorite actor, Gary Sinise.

Isn't it just a pathetic show? I love him, but I couldn't endure it. I really couldn't.

CSI: M lost me when Rory Cochrane left (even though I still like the cast a great deal but I hated the way they killed off Rory's character). Now I watch CSI:M if I think of it, or if my parents talk me into it. The only show I watch without fail is NCIS, because of David McCallum, Pauley Perrette and Sean Murray.

I'm sort of a strange fannish person in the sense I don't really like television much. Okay, very little at all.

I'm in a monstrously grumptastic mood today

I was yesterday so it must be going around. *hugs*

the disaprity between the fannish consumer and the fannish producer has grown even more pronounced and how much I hate that (the idea that because someone isn't a writer or vidder they have no intrinsic value sends me into a frenzy of anger)

Wow. I had no idea people acted like that. Call me sheltered, but... that's not cool. I mean, as a fanzine publisher, I get complaints about certain things, but I would never think that just because someone isn't a vidder/writer/publisher/what have you, they have no value to the fannish world. So not cool.

*hugs*

Date: 2004-12-29 05:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
Re the value thing, the weirdest part? The people who often say that are the ones who think they have no value because they are "just consumers." I can't tell you how many people have sent feedback to me and told me they never wrote before becuse they didn't think they had anything worthwhile to say since they aren't writers or vidders. And worse, a lot of BNFs have only encouraged this sort of thing -- quashing discussions on lists, etc because only the big writers have any value, you know.

I've seen sensible, smart women encourage this sort of disparity and then disingenuously say they aren't BNFs and oh I never asked for this status blah blah... it's so dispiriting to watch people do that. As fandom's gotten larger and larger, the focus has shifted primarily to the producers -- especially the prolific and vocal producers -- and the "just consumers" now think they have no voice or right or need to speak up. It just frosts me, because those are the people whose opinions and feedback and input I value most. but so many people encourage this "I don't know the details/skills/arcane knowledge of this" response that I think it's endemic to fandom. the fans of fans thing also leaves me really cold, because I think it's an outgrowth of this syndrome.

I need to write about this more at length, and I know I'll get flamed by some of my friends because we've had heated discussions before, but... I feel like I need to get this off my chest. without the consumers, the writers would have a pretty small audience. That larger group is way more important.

Date: 2004-12-29 05:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maubast.livejournal.com
I don't think it's wrong, per se, to have 'fans' - what I think is wrong is the BNFs who feel they are above us mere mortals. They have their cliques and their ways and never ever mingle with us po' folk.

I'm not saying you're wrong about the fans of fans outgrowth thing, but I really don't think it's bad or wrong to have a fannish following. I think there's ways to behave and ways not to behave. Manners, don'tcha know. I mean, I've got a small following of my own and I get down and muck around with them. See, I consider them my friends. And I thinks thats the way it should be. I don't consider myself above them - or better than them. I've been smacked with the "I'm better than you" syndrome from BNFs before. Not so nice.

I'm looking forward to reading more of your thoughts on it. I'm really interested.

Date: 2004-12-29 02:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maygra.livejournal.com
As fandom's gotten larger and larger, the focus has shifted primarily to the producers -- especially the prolific and vocal producers -- and the "just consumers" now think they have no voice or right or need to speak up.

I hear this frequently, but I'm kind of in the camp that thinks this is more an effect of fandom moving to the net. It's never *not* been like this since I got in fandom. I had the same feeling when I first got online, knowing nothing, not even aware that *fandom* of this sort existed at all. It wasn't something I ever experienced before, despite being someone who went to a lot of conventions (sci-fi, comic cons) before I even had computer access. It didn't take me long to trip over "big" fans, people everyone knew, everyone referenced, especially *slash* which was still fairly small (as far as my perception went) Kellie Matthews, Kevin Robnett, those were my BNF's. I didn't feel like I had anything much to say about the show (HL) or the characters or concepts and it took me a couple of years, I think, before I felt confident enough to actually discuss things like characterization or arcs or underlying texts and messages...but what I could do was *write*. And it's what I did. But I also sent pretty gushing fan-girly letter to people, feeling pretty stupid and presumptuous at the time. The discussions were *so* very much of an academic-like nature that I felt totally inadequate. I still do, watching the discussions on LJ, where people who really do understand literary standards and are vastly more well-read than I make me feel like a first year comparative lit student again and I sucked at that class.

I don't disagree that some BNF's take themselves way to seriously, but I think that's more of function of their personalities that their status. (and the willingness of other people to fawn.) I've been there and the first time anyone ever referred to me as a BNF I was pretty much like, "what? are you nuts? all I do is write stories -- and badly edited ones at that."

It took me awhile to realize the status had way more to do with the fact that I was prolific rather than because I was good or because I contributed in some overall way to the whole HL fandom -- most of whom were still calling slash both an abomination and an aberration.

My one definition of a BNF is still guided by those early people, the people who actually influenced fandom in some way, either by producing or analyzing or being a reference, and people who have a high amount of name recognition.

Gah. all I think I'm saying is that I know it's different for you, but for me, coming in so much later, it's always been like this. HL was a balkanized fandom long before that became the term du jour, long before TPM hit the net...and even long before I realized there had been a whole other fannish existence before the net. The only thing I see now is that the people who can discuss fannish tropes (either fandom specific or on the meta level) -- they are hard to keep track of -- there's so many and way too many fandoms for me to keep up with. But there are a few. Cathexis comes to mind for the meta. Cereta at the fanfic Symposium, not because of what she writes but because of the kind of space she provides. And you do too, Gwyn, when I think of people who have managed to reach across multiple fandoms and leave an impact. I know you don't think you have but really, I think it's there.

Date: 2004-12-29 04:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
While a lot of it is definitely longing for Ye Olden Dayes, much of it is just a longing for the ability to have something to talk about! I think one of the things that Joss Whedon's shows did was to inspire people into other areas that they never thought they might enter -- people discovered fandom at large, got into other things, conversation was encouraged, and so on. They were a great entry-level force that I don't see in any other fandom. Heck I think even people who didn't watch any of them felt their impact by widening the fan base so much.

Most of my friends who've been in fandom a long time are kind of tired out, the newer ones have drifted because the things that brought them in are gone and they have no passion, and the ones who are still active consumers think they shouldn't say anything because they're just consumers. Ergo, no one's saying much of anything at all. Ennui, I guess. And as passionate as I am about F&F, no one is talking. There's writing going on, but no talking. For most people that's fine; for me, it's a huge hole. I'm a talker, I guess.

Okay, so...

Date: 2004-12-29 05:08 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maygra.livejournal.com
What do you want to talk about? [g].

We can dissect the varying approaches to Dom...misunderstood or borderline psychopath? And is Brian jsut a serious adrenaline junkie or does he seriously have a death wish?

I can argue for both...

Re: Okay, so...

Date: 2004-12-29 06:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
Every once in a while I think about starting a list. And then I think, no. Because I'd like to discuss the whole universe, and fic, and vids, and everything, and inevitably someone will bitch if it's an open list (you're so meeeeeen) or someone will be a flagrant diva and quash discussion, and if it's a private list, then no one will talk after the initial flurry. So I gave up that thought. I dunno.

I've been thinking about doing a variation on lierdumoa's my Dom is... my Brian is... post. Maybe I should.

We can dissect the varying approaches to Dom...misunderstood or borderline psychopath?

Can he be both? ;-) The thing I think rubs me the wrong way most in this fandom is that yet again, we have the big mean ugly mean guy syndrome (all the tough ones are big and mean and ugly and mean!) and the pretty frail girly suffering angelic beloved guy syndrome. I hate that. I actually think, in a lot of ways, that Dom is way more sensitive and emotional than Brian is -- you see it especially with Mia, the way he relates to his team, especially in that dinner scene. But he's just big ugly mean guy to 90% of the fandom, because Brian is so pretty and sweet and frail and the "little guy" (nemmind that he's taller). Gah. So, anyway, I think Dom can be both misunderstood and a psycho. He's got lots of facets. (Though not a psycopath -- psychotic, maybe, but not -path, since that indicates an entirely different behavior set and relates strongly to sociopathology, which he is decidedly not.)

Re: Okay, so...

Date: 2004-12-29 07:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maygra.livejournal.com
Can he be both? ;-) The thing I think rubs me the wrong way most in this fandom is that yet again, we have the big mean ugly mean guy syndrome (all the tough ones are big and mean and ugly and mean!) and the pretty frail girly suffering angelic beloved guy syndrome. I hate that. I actually think, in a lot of ways, that Dom is way more sensitive and emotional than Brian is -- you see it especially with Mia, the way he relates to his team, especially in that dinner scene. But he's just big ugly mean guy to 90% of the fandom, because Brian is so pretty and sweet and frail and the "little guy" (nemmind that he's taller). Gah. So, anyway, I think Dom can be both misunderstood and a psycho. He's got lots of facets.

Se, we really are experiencing this fandom differently, because my first impression was that it was all about Dom -- that people missed (or ignored ) the fact that while he is indeed, kind of a nurturing , take-care-of-family guy, he is also a criminal. Not just for Linder but because he's been master minding truck heists for months, and when he's not doing that, he racing illegally. Both of which are part of his allure and his charm, but I definitely go the impression that None Of It Was His Fault. Granted, the impression didn't last long and by the time I'd read most of what was out there, it seemed more balanced. My impression was that yeah, in some corners, Brian was the frail tiny one…but also that he was the one in the Wrong for lying to Dom about who he was. (Which you know, maybe he was, but uh, criminal. Police investigation…)

I am all for the rebel without a cause admiration -- really. And I don't actually see Dom as really being psychotic. I think he consciously puts that rep out there because you know, in the crowd he runs with, it's useful.

I do agree that Dom is both sensitive and more emotional, although I think it's more that dichotomy of Brian appearing sensitive (which he is, but it's more obvious on him) but less outwardly emotional, whereas Dom's sensitivity is something you only catch glimpses of but emotionally, he is *out* there. Angry, happy, impatient, amused, what he's feeling you see immediately. In truth, I think Brian has more pathological behaviors than Dom, mostly because we never really see in the film what *drives* him. We know, or see more of what drives Dom, for good or bad.


Re: Okay, so...

Date: 2004-12-29 08:13 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I have this theory (my theory actually goes better with a large glass of alcohol in hand, but I can't do that over the net) about slash: 90% of slash fandom has to have a girl. They don't know they want a girl, they think they don't, but they do. So one guy gets to be the girl -- and it's always, always the one who: is shorter or thinner (Brian, Ray Doyle), intellectual (Blair, Daniel), younger (Vin Tanner), works in some type of non-establishment job or manner (Mulder), or any combo of the above (Methos being a weird combo/non-representative ringer, but he is thinner and therefore so much more girly, you know). We ten percenters have a lot more trouble because I think in most ways, Brian really is the tougher one emotionally. the big twist is that Brian is the hero of the piece, and that's usually exclusively the Big Mean Ugly Guy role (Jim, Duncan, Chris -- especially because he is the authority figure, which earns him the title even though he's the one who cries canonically on the show! -- and so on). Dom's a true anti-hero, like kadymae has talked about.

The problem might be too that Vin Diesel kind of walked off with the movie and so a lot of the attention was focused on him. It was such a star-making role that probably if you're coming into the fandom but not a fan of his, you would think it was oriented that way, but that 90% of the slash world, they're all cooing over the girl of the piece (just ask a Stargate fan who likes Jack just as he is!), which is what I noticed right away with Brian. And they make him such a fucking saint and it's just like... jesus christ, he let the criminal go! He's not much better!

Brian doesn't fit the role, though -- that's what's so frustrating. He's pretty, yeah, but we know next to nothing about him, whereas we get to know Dom very well. We rarely get to see his emotions beyond surface stuff, but Dom runs the gamut. In a way, they set Brian up almost too heroically by making him so mysterious that he loses focus. Which I think also attracts the "pretty girl" fans.

I like the fact that Dom is a criminal. I like how he's teetering on the edge of something really dangerous. Because I don't think that's who he is, really, but what he's become to be in the only world he knows how to live in. Watching The Wire recently has been cool that way -- it's a rare show where both sides of the law are given a chance to show all their facets, good and bad, and I think that's what F&F did really well with Dom. Unfortunately, they forgot to fill in stuff with Brian until the second movie!

Oh and this is getting too long, but I have Tanner thinking about something in a very mocking sarcastic way in the next part that I think is at work here -- that whole "you can't cage a beautiful wild animal, you have to let him roam free" kind of over the top shit. I think that could be a really funny concept to work with, seen from the other side.

Re: Okay, so...

Date: 2004-12-30 05:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maygra.livejournal.com
I have this theory (my theory actually goes better with a large glass of alcohol in hand, but I can't do that over the net) about slash: 90% of slash fandom has to have a girl. They don't know they want a girl, they think they don't, but they do. So one guy gets to be the girl --

I don't disagree with that. In a way, given that most slash writers are women, it makes sense. It's a) what they are familiar with and while it may not go as far as self-identification, it's still close enough to count and b) it's what they are familiar with [g] in that it's what most of us (not all) but most of us grew up reading -- that kind of romance, the soft against the hard, the emotional against the logical, the taming of men by love, the rise of a woman's self esteem by being the one to tame such a wild creature. That's a highly idealized look at it and I'm not abandoning all my feminist roots, but that framework is there, for nearly every woman regardless of whether they embrace it, revile it or want to change it -- it's still a common point of reference.

which is what I noticed right away with Brian. And they make him such a fucking saint and it's just like... jesus christ, he let the criminal go! He's not much better!

Well, I'd agree that he's not a saint, but at the same time, I don't think my impression of the fandom as a whole is that he's made out to be one. More like a tarnished angel…throwing it all away for love. I do it myself to some extent mostly because I think *Dom* sees him that way. I mean, Brian ends up forcing Dom to look at things differently through the whole movie. Not just what he's doing with his life, but everything. Dom tacitly gives his approval to Dom and Mia when you kind of get the impression that maybe Mia and Dom have clashed on this before. Set up or not, Brian saves Dom's ass from the cops after the first race, making him wonder where his team was and how much reciprocity is going on there -- because given the party scene Dom and Brian walk into, if Dom had been picked up, he might have been cooling his heels in jail overnight until someone gave him a phone, and my guess is that it would have been Mia he'd call to either bail him out or come get him, rather than Vince or Leon or even Letty. And even after Brain reveals that he's a cop, Dom still owes him, for Vince, for doing that Dom couldn't. There's a lot of sacrifice on Brian 's part regardless of motive and on some level, Dom had to wonder why Brian is like that…yeah, he let him go, and if you take 2F2F into account, Brian then *ran* and didn't face the music, not voluntarily. In my own head, in my own writing, I have that in the back of my mind -- that in UB, if Dom hadn't come back (also regardless of reason) Brian would have run anyway. So for me, the idea was to balance the scales back out -- only Dom doesn't know he id. I'm not sure Brian realizes it entirely. Be a different twist to take if I ever get around to doing another ending.

I'll come back to this but it's midnight here and my brain is shutting down.

Re: Okay, so...

Date: 2004-12-30 04:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I have a terrible feeling that poor Bast is having to endure all these comments, because I think LJ sends comments to the original commenter on the thread... not sure, and you may want to kill me for this, but I thought I'd start a new thread down at the bottom, which means you'll have to come back to the original post! But I notice it's getting narrower and narrower, too, so I thought I could give us some extra space if I add a new comment at the bottom (I guess this also means that no one else will participate in the convo becuse you and I started this long after everyone will have seen the post).

Date: 2004-12-28 11:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] umbo.livejournal.com
*hugs*

Can I just say that the mere idea of you getting into The Wire excites me like you wouldn't believe? I haven't actually seen season 1 yet, as I started watching last year and haven't invested in the discs yet, but it is *such* an amazing show, and I would *love* to see you reviewing it! Omar really is an amzing character, and Kima (the lesbian cop) is pretty cool too, but for me the most fascinating is Stringer Bell. Then again, I'm not sure what all he was up to in the first season.

But I do so wish there were another Wheadon show on. What would you think about going back and watching episodes again and writing review from that?

*more hugs*

Date: 2004-12-29 05:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
There's definitely a lot of H:LotS in the Wire, isn't there? Stringer doesn't really ring a bell yet for me... but I'm only five eps in.

I am actually sorry I returned the disc today. Because now I'm wishing I could watch omar again. He's just... astonishing. I am madly in love! In a fascinating character way, not a BSO way.

Date: 2004-12-29 01:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] reginaspina.livejournal.com
I would love to read your reviews of "The Wire" - I started watching with Season 2 and haven't seen Season 1 yet, but it's definitely a show that rewards thinking and rich analysis and Season 2 was absolutely brilliant (I was less fond of the recently concluded Season 3, but part of that may change when I rewatch and see how everything comes together!) More than any other TV show I've ever seen (including the Jossverse ones!) "The Wire" is like an incredibly engrossing novel, and you have to watch all the way to the end of each season before stuff makes sense, I think.

The actress you're thinking of is Sonja Sohn, I believe, and Kima becomes a much more interesting character. McNulty is always and forever fascinating (and Dominic West is quite the hottie as I can attest having spoken to him at a booksigning recently!)

Date: 2004-12-29 05:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I'm sort of annoyed that I have to go away for a bit and won't be able to watch the next disc in the series for a while. Because Omar... whoa. I really liked Dominic West in The Forgotten, and he's great here -- every once in a while that accent slips, but he's otherwise note perfect. And hot!

Date: 2004-12-29 02:33 am (UTC)
ext_1771: Joe Flanigan looking A-Dorable. (hermionestudying by iconspell)
From: [identity profile] monanotlisa.livejournal.com
Wishing for more meta as well. Should start writing some more myself. But ack, Exam looming. Le sigh.

Date: 2004-12-29 03:33 am (UTC)
ext_1973: (starbuck)
From: [identity profile] elz.livejournal.com
I've got my fingers crossed that the new version of Battlestar Galactica will inspire lots of meta and fannish chatter (although I know a fair number of people on lj won't watch it because it's too science fictiony), especially since I can't afford HBO or Showtime either. I've felt like a bit of a slacker this year, only writing two-line reactions (if that) to Veronica Mars and Lost, but the truth is that you can't fake the kind of enthusiasm that makes you *want* to talk about a show in any sort of depth. I miss it, though, especially since I'm not a 'producer' of any sort and, yeah, it's easy to start to feel superfluous.

Date: 2004-12-29 05:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I'm definitely looking forward to seeing Edward James Olmos on TV again regularly. I hope it will produce that enthusiasm -- and in some respects, maybe as sci-fi, it will, because there seems to be more tolerance and openness to genre in fandom than there is for things like crime and family type stuff.

Well, if you don't count your stunning icons as producing, I don't know what to call it! Because you've certainly given me many favorites and much pleasure with them.

Date: 2004-12-29 03:42 am (UTC)
ext_9063: (Fairuza Balk by M'lyn)
From: [identity profile] mlyn.livejournal.com
Now that you are off dialup and on high-speed 'net, have you thought about doing the bittorrent-type thing for downloading new episodes? That could solve your problem about having to wait for new episodes of premium cable shows.

You might also think about pimping people into fandoms you already enjoy, and want other people to get into. I mean, look at me: TFaTF, Mag 7, Second Sight (hell, Clive Owen in general), Firefly, a Mulder/Skinner perspective of XF, and I'm working up to LFN. You've pimped without even trying, just from me coming over and hanging out. I would never have known about Second Sight had you not had it playing one day when I arrived. Maybe I'm just easy, but I think you should give the old pimping game a shot. For instance, after watching your Keen Eddie vid, I'd love to hear more about that, and you haven't said boo yet.

Damn, I'm sort of liking this idea. Maybe I should do a ship manifesto for Herger/Ahmed from The Thirteenth Warrior?

Sorry the feedback thing is still preying on your mind. I'd kick some ass if it didn't result in bigger problems.

Date: 2004-12-29 03:45 am (UTC)
ext_9063: (Vin green by M'lyn)
From: [identity profile] mlyn.livejournal.com
[livejournal.com profile] sandrine's post elsewhere on my f-list just reminded me: we HAVE to watch Brotherhood of the Wolf sometime.

Date: 2004-12-29 05:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] paris7am.livejournal.com
You took the words right from my mouth...
Torrent opens up a whole new world of fannish happiness.
For myself, I jumped out of american tv and into asian and british. Huge difference.
Mlyn, I can't wait til you get to LFN - I'd love to discuss with you.

Date: 2004-12-29 09:14 pm (UTC)
ext_9063: (Art - A Gesture Life 2 by M'lyn)
From: [identity profile] mlyn.livejournal.com
It may take some time. Gwyn and I still have to finish Firefly, but she's going away this weekend and I'll be returning to school.

Date: 2004-12-29 05:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I think I might have finally found a song to vid BotW to... I need to look into the rest of her music because her sound is so cool, and I want to see what kind of possibility it gives me. But I can't even remember her name now... gar. Must hunt around and see if i can find it.

Date: 2004-12-29 05:40 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I know at least two people who'd love a 13th Warrior manifesto. I've thought about the torrent thing but... between the vidding and the other stuff, I don't have much room and much ability to learn yet another thing. I honestly don't understand it at all despite Jo's constant efforts to show me how it works. I'm completely bewildered, and I'm so pressed for space anyway...

I've never been fortunate in pimping. The times I've had people tune in to a running show, they tuned in during the worst episode of the series or whatever. plus I'm kiss of death -- what I like always fails, 99% of the time. People don't want to keep getting sucked into dead shows. Movies are easier, but... I just never seemed to have luck. this is the first time I've ever really had luck pimping! Maybe you just have to know how to spot that "pimp me" look in someone's eyes...

Date: 2004-12-29 09:16 pm (UTC)
ext_9063: (Vin green by M'lyn)
From: [identity profile] mlyn.livejournal.com
this is the first time I've ever really had luck pimping! Maybe you just have to know how to spot that "pimp me" look in someone's eyes...

I'm just really easily led. If you told me you loved pickles and gave a big long dissertation on the glory of pickles, I'd probably try them again...and I *hate* pickles.

Hmm, 13th Warrior work. That'll have to come after my Brian-is-not-an-alpha-male essay, and Part Four, and the Dom/Brian/Vince triangle thing (if it ends up happening).

Date: 2004-12-29 03:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] just-eunice.livejournal.com
The Wire! *clings to you*

I think I might die of happiness if an actual fandom grew out of that show, I love it so.

I can't keep about 2/3 of the characters straight, and especially the different gang street wars confuse me, as do the relationships of the hateful, venal cops that McNulty battles with

This is on purpose, and it's part of the style of the show that I find so fascinating. Each season begins with a scattershot of events and characters that aren't always connected in immediately identifiable ways, and often seem random. Lots of them. As the season progresses the tension ratchets up as the lines between them become clearer and start drawing together until everything, and I do mean *everything*, collects in on itself into one climactic point that finishes off the season in mindblowing fashion.

Until you start the next season where the loose threads left over, and the core cast, are joined by a whole *new* set of scattershot events and characters that leave you going, "Hey! I just figured out what was going on, stop that! And what the hell does *this* have to do with x?" Season 2 is particularly good at starting you out with a big old "What the fuck?" and then nailing you right between the eyes as it all starts to come clear and ties back into season 1.

So, yeah. You're supposed to be confused and overwhelmed by the massive amounts of information and characters getting thrown at you to start with. I still have a bunch of season 3 episodes to catch up with, but it seems to be following the same pattern, even as it returns to familiar ground (vague enough for you? don't want to spoil).

Also, OMAR!

Date: 2004-12-29 04:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I have a terrible feeling that this is the kind of show I'm going to have to watch again after I've finished it. Deadwood was like that; I found it very hard to warm to at first, and I love westerns -- it was a really unlovable show to me. As we kept going on, though, we realized we were missing a lot, and when we finished our first run through, we watched it again and were blown away. I think The Wire is going to be like that -- I wasn't sure if I was enjoying everything until the fifth episode, and the stuff with Omar just knocked me over. When he and his boyfriend and... lieutenant, I guess, set those other dealers up and ambushed them in the alley, I was really amazed, and then that scene with D'Angelo and his girlfriend at dinner... they hooked me big time. So my plan is to watch the rest of the eps and then either rent them again, or see if I might be able to get a set somehow. If for no other reason than Omar, but McNulty's a pretty big benefit, too. ;-)

I know so many people who just dimiss crime dramas out of hand, and I think they're going to miss a lot. At least I might be able to lure the slash fans with talk about Omar.

The Wire....

Date: 2004-12-29 07:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] melinafandom.livejournal.com
One of my favorite discoveries so far is The Wire.

Discoveries?!? ::sniff:: Nobody listens to me! I have been pimping (http://www.livejournal.com/users/melina123/7878.html) this show since, like, forever (http://www.livejournal.com/users/melina123/36657.html).

Anyway :) I am glad you are enjoying it. I almost wish I'd had the chance to watch it on DVD when I saw it the first time, just to keep the pacing better. Don't worry too much about keeping track of everyone -- the important characters sort themselves out in time. (Mostly :)

It's hard to explain why I like The Wire, really, except that it's like an antidote to all those shows I've ever watched that assumed the audience was stupid, or didn't pay attention, and needed things repeated and spoon-fed to them. I like the complexity and the ambiguity and the fact that it demands my complete attention in the ways that most shows simply do not.

I think you won't be the only person watching the show for the first time on DVD, and you should feel free to review if you want! I'd be interested in reading your take on things.

Links of possible interest:

-- My report on The Wire at the Paley Festival last year (no spoilers) (http://www.livejournal.com/users/melina123/18551.html#cutid3).

-- A great article about The Wire at Salon (http://www.salon.com/ent/feature/2004/10/01/the_wire/index.html) -- exhaustively cataloging the characters, among other things. It does have spoilers. (You must watch an ad for a day pass, blah blah.)

-- David Simon and George Pelacanos did an interesting interview on Fresh Air on 9/23/04. You should be able to find it here (http://freshair.npr.org/) with a date or keyword search. I don't recall any spoilers -- it's more about the show in general.

Re: The Wire....

Date: 2004-12-29 08:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I know, I know! But I didn't have a way to see it before! It was only recently that Jo started doing the bit torrent thing and I didn't feel good about asking her to DL stuff just for me. Though I think I can pimp it to her now that I've watched it; I think it's just up her alley.

I will definitely check the links. If for no other reason than that the more I read about it, the more I will be able to get the names straight of all the damn characters!

Date: 2004-12-29 07:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] superplin.livejournal.com
I miss the shows, too, and writing about them. My big impediment now is lack of time, though, not lack of interest (and I confess I'm really frustrated to be on vacation but not have access to my DVDs, so I can't even take advantage of the down time to write any of the approximately 6,843,147 essays I've got ideas for). I'm feeling really disconnected from those few conversations that do continue on, too, because I am tired of the same old arguments and mostly just keep my mouth shut when people say things I object to. I am hungry for stories, but then a lot of the stories that I do read disappoint or annoy me because I disagree with some of the basic interpretations of character or story or whatever.

Maybe I've just grown crotchety in my old age. Heh.

I know what you mean about the emphasis on producers; it's been that way since I got involved, at least. I personally got the BNF smackdown very early on in my fandom career, more than once, and so I quickly learned to shut up and leave well enough alone. I have my own issues about writing anyway, especially fiction, so I was easily convinced that it was Not My Place to comment on certain things, at least in public.

However, I have been consumed by this one particular idea, and have decided it's useless to fight it. So I am just going to dive in and see what happens, nervous as I am. I'm not sure it will make me a bona fide "producer," since it's kind of an oddball grey-area thing, but at least I'll be playing in fandom instead of just sitting around missing it.

Date: 2004-12-29 08:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I'm thrileld to hear that you're thinking of doing something. You will have an eager and willing helpmeet in me if you need anything at all -- sounding board, edit, anything.

I think the emphasis on producers has always been around, but in medieval times, the only real way into fandom was to participate. You could order zines, read APAs, go to cons, and still be a quiet mouse in the corner, but you had to have some level of active contact with others. Which tends to by necessity improve the odds of conversation. Particularly if you were from an area where you didn't have other fans around you -- to trade tapes, zines, etc. You had to make more of an effort and make more contact, and people had to do the same to you. Things are much more anonymous now, you can have thousands of people read your story, for instance, and never know they are there. You will never be able to find out about mutualities with other people. There's nothing but a big black sucking hole for 99% of the fannish world.

And to me that's sad, and kind of demoralizing. The hallmark of fandom for decades, since the sci-fi novel fans way back when, has been dialog and connection and analysis and participation. It's just gone in large part now. I guess to others it's meaningless, but to me, it's a loss.

Date: 2004-12-30 02:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] superplin.livejournal.com
I'm thrileld to hear that you're thinking of doing something. You will have an eager and willing helpmeet in me if you need anything at all -- sounding board, edit, anything.

Be very, very careful about what you offer: I'm awfully likely to take you up on it! Planning this thing is scarily reminiscent of planning a story, even though it's not a story, dammit. Heh. (Issues, issues, get your long-festering issues right here!) And I am beyond out of practice with this sort of thing in general (she says vaguely).

Things are much more anonymous now, you can have thousands of people read your story, for instance, and never know they are there. You will never be able to find out about mutualities with other people. There's nothing but a big black sucking hole for 99% of the fannish world.

I obviously have nothing to compare my experience to, but it surprises me that there is less interaction now, especially with venues such as LiveJournal that don't even require the effort of sending an e-mail. It seems the ideal way for even shy people to give a minimal level of feedback without having to expose themselves too much (or, uh, something that sounds a little less obscene). But then again, I'm a terrible example, since a lot of times I feel... exonerated, I guess is the word, from giving feedback when I see that lots of other people have already commented and I don't feel I have anything new to contribute. So I suppose it cuts both ways.

Of course, since I had never even heard of fandom before, and probably wouldn't have known about it at all if not for the Internet, I can't be entirely negative about the medium. ;)

Date: 2004-12-29 11:22 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] smithereen.livejournal.com
I've been in kind of the same boat you have in terms of looking around going...where are all the shows to get obsessively fannish over? I watch Veronica Mars and Lost and all the stuff everyone's getting into lately, but it just doesn't grab me in a fannish way. There are plenty of shows on TV I like, but none (except oddly, One Tree Hill) that I LOVE or that I feel a real urge to talk about. I'm sort of transferring my obsessiveness onto anime right now, but I think some of the reason for that is just that the tv shows I'm watching aren't giving me enough to sink my teeth into. And anime, while arguably on crack half the time, is constantly intriguing me with the boundaries it crosses (especially in terms of sexuality), the quality of ongoing story arcs, the creativity of its storytelling, and the depth of its characters. Granted, I think once I've seen more shows certain conventions and cliches within the genre will start to wear on me. But right now it feels like....ah ha! something new! something to think about! and I just don't get that feeling from any of the tv I'm watching right now.

Date: 2004-12-30 04:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
Yeah, my friends who've really gotten into anime tell me similar things. I have the weirdest disconnect with comics and anime -- I love them both (I mean, I love them!) but not in a fannish way. Like, I can't see reading fic or vidding or writing... I have no idea why. Though if they ever made an animated version of The Authority (or Dark Knight or Watchmen) I could see vidding... for some reason I seem to only connect on a fannish level with live action characters. I can't figure out why, it makes no sense to me. So I'm envious of the people who get that out of the anime and manga world, becuase it seems to be a really happening place right now.

Date: 2004-12-30 11:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] smithereen.livejournal.com
I actually do understand that disconnect. I think that's why I avoided anime for so long. When it comes down to it, I do find it easier to engage with live action characters because they are so...well, for lack of a better word...three dimensional. I don't mean that they're naturally better drawn characters because hello to all the bad writing and acting in so much live action stuff, but live action is more expressive, and huh...closer...more immediate...easier to touch and therefore to feel emotionally. (At least for me). So I do have some intrinsic barrier between me and the characters that has to be overcome when I watch anime, which isn't there with live action. And that's even before the sub/dub issues, which I personally also find distancing. So yeah, even though I'm feeling the fannish urges for it myself, I do have some idea where you're coming from.

Date: 2004-12-30 03:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tir.livejournal.com
Ooh, The Wire! This is a show that needs more fans. Anytime you're wondering how people are connected or who's who, feel free to ask me. I've watched obsessively since day one. Maybe by fourth season there will be enough people caught up that we can build some community around the show.

Date: 2004-12-30 04:41 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
This is always the problem with HBO shows, isn't it? (Or showtime as well). There are still so many people who can't or won't do the bit torrent things, and few people can afford them, and they have to wait for the discs to come out. We used to get tapes from people who had HBO of some shows, but they were always crappy and hard to watch. I guess that makes DVDs worth waiting for.

But I think I am scarily in love with Omar. And now I know what happens to his boyfriend and I'm afraid to keep watching! But I am compelled.

Date: 2004-12-30 06:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tir.livejournal.com
Omar rocks. And poor Brandon.

Have you hit the scene yet where McNulty and Bunk work the old crime scene where the woman whose name I can't recall at the moment got killed? That was one of the great moments of the first season for me.

Season two comes out on dvd in January. I hope they do season three soon, so more people can catch up.

Date: 2004-12-30 06:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
Yes! Fuck. Fuck. Fuckity fuck fuck. Fuck! Fuck me.

I was dying -- as someone who used the f-word entirely too much, I thought that was not only a great policework scene, but also hysterical in terms of just how many times they said fuck. McNulty is both smart and stupid at the same time, and I like how they don't softpeddle that.

Date: 2004-12-30 06:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tir.livejournal.com
I loved just how clearly they communicated even though they never said anything other than variations on "fuck." And McNulty will continue to be both smart and dumb for quite some time.

(I'd use the McNulty icon again, but your pretty Clive icon really had to be followed by another Clive icon.)

So, Maygra...

Date: 2004-12-30 05:14 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
Anyways! I was thinking last night about the whole lying thing and how people focus on that when Dom was Bad Rude Man (that's a Spike line, btw). See, I love that. For me it's the crux of the entire relationship. Becuase I don't trust anyone, not even my dad, though he's the closest I come to trusting another person. I think that basically everyone will fuck you over if you give them the slightest bit of trust. And I can see that in Dom, all the time, throughout the movie, and yet he ends up trusting Brian, having faith in him, knowing he shouldn't. That struggle is writ large on his face.

And whether you're a criminal or a doctor/lawyer/merchant chief, if you fell in love with someone whose whole existence in your life was a lie, how would you feel? I can't imagine anyone, whatever their occupation and whether we agree that it's a good or bad one, feeling really perky about that. So for me that emphasis on Brian's cover and how betrayed Dom would feel is the most enjoyable part of the fandom. I like especially playing with the notion that Dom couldn't really know what would be real and what wasn't, especially since Brian is such a blank slate in many ways (well, yeah, I already am playing with that, I realize).

See... I have this terrible weakness for "it wasn't all a lie" stories. HUGE. I've waited all my fannish life for one of these! From the first time my little nascent fannish mind saw that kind of story (on of all things The FBI, where this criminal had to dupe this woman and he fell in love and when Efram Zimbalist was hauling him away the guy looked at the broken hearted woman and you knew -- you knew! -- that it wasn't all a lie and he tried to tell her but she wouldn't listen; then they did it on Mission Impossible with Leonard Nimoy and I was dead! Dead, I tell you!) I have waited for a fandom I could write that sort of "not everything was a lie" aftermath around. Because you would always be full of doubts, and you can never really truly know another person, and if they lied to you from the beginning... regardless of who you were, that would kill you. You'd never know if they truly loved *you.*

I think you were investigating La Femme Nikita for AU scenarios, weren't you? Did you see the episode War? Where Michael, who's lied to Nikita continually, finally goes one step too far and she doesn't really believe that he loves her, so she thinks he's just despicable, and then at the end when she's unconscious he says his variation on "it wasn't all a lie." It took years for her to get over that and she never heard him tell her that it wasn't a lie that he loved her. And so I keep thinking of that with Dom and Brian, that Dom wouldn't really know or trust that he could believe it wasn't all part of the setup.

This makes me freakishly happy (obviously, as I'm wasting thousands of words writing about it now), but it is, for me, the entire heart of their relationship. Whatever Dom is -- criminal, psycho, thug... however you view him -- his relationship with Brian is completely predicated on a lie, but underneath that lie is this huge iceberg of other important stuff. Can they find that? For me that's the greatest fun of this fandom. Though I'm starting to think the rest of it just wants sex, but... I love this core issue of trust and betrayal and where love can find a place to stand within it.

Re: So, Gwyn...

Date: 2004-12-31 01:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maygra.livejournal.com
Anyways! I was thinking last night about the whole lying thing and how people focus on that when Dom was Bad Rude Man (that's a Spike line, btw). See, I love that. For me it's the crux of the entire relationship. Because I don't trust anyone, not even my dad, though he's the closest I come to trusting another person. I think that basically everyone will fuck you over if you give them the slightest bit of trust. And I can see that in Dom, all the time, throughout the movie, and yet he ends up trusting Brian, having faith in him, knowing he shouldn't. That struggle is writ large on his face.

It's an interesting way to approach the text. (Or subtext.) I pretty much trust everyone unless they give me reason not to, and even when I find them in some kind of breach of trust, it's by degrees; i.e., if you lie to me were you trying to protect me, yourself, something else, or was it tied into some sense of self-worth or self esteem that you thought by lying you'd get my approval or hide some flaw of my own. I'm not saying it's necessary or even something I like, but I figure most people are more like me than not, that they are doing the best they can with what they know. So, there's a lot of give in my relationships for the most part __ I think I cut people a lot of slack and to some extent I expect it to be reciprocated -- that is, if I do something/say something you don't like, please don't assume it was done out of malice or vindictiveness or even carelessness. I just don't *expect* people to fuck me over because they can…I expect them to treat me about like they want to be treated. Just as I generally find that if I like someone (in the friendship style like or even friendly acquaintance kind of like) they probably like me back, or at least find me tolerable enough to not run away when they see me coming.

On the other hand, I do expect a certain amount of honesty from people. So, Brian's lying to Dom doesn’t bother me as much for what it is as much as I'm more interested in, as you say, how it affects their relationship -- and I think it's reciprocal. Because Dom isn't entirely honest with Brian either. I mean, granted, Brian never comes out and asks him if he's hijacking trucks, but at the same time, when Dom is going along, being kind of enchanted by Brian, or even when he thinks Mia and Brian might actually be the real thing, he's kind of testing Brian about without actually telling him why. So the levels of honestly there are not so curt and dried as ooh, look Brian lied to Dom. Well, duh.

So, out of the actual text of the movies there's a lot to play with…no matter how you approach Dom and Brian getting together. I find it a slightly harder sell for Dom to think there's any higher ground for him to stand on if accusing Brian of lying to him about who he is, when he's into shit that could (and eventually does) get people hurt and killed. It's not an impossible sell, mind you…but for Dom to call Brian on his honesty, he'd need ot own up to his own failings too.

Leonard Nimoy and I was dead! Dead, I tell you!) I have waited for a fandom I could write that sort of "not everything was a lie" aftermath around. Because you would always be full of doubts, and you can never really truly know another person, and if they lied to you from the beginning... regardless of who you were, that would kill you. You'd never know if they truly loved *you.*

I kind of like those too in an odd way, but again I think it's more my optimism of trying to find silver in a dark cloud as opposed to the tortured not knowing part.

I'm starting to think the rest of it just wants sex, but... I love this core issue of trust and betrayal and where love can find a place to stand within it.

Clarify? Do you mean you think the rest of your concentration on this want sex [g] or the fandom is more interested in the sexy sweaty part?

Re: So, Gwyn...

Date: 2004-12-31 04:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gwyn-r.livejournal.com
I find it a slightly harder sell for Dom to think there's any higher ground for him to stand on if accusing Brian of lying to him about who he is, when he's into shit that could (and eventually does) get people hurt and killed.

Oh, I don't think he thinks that. But there's a difference, to me, of full disclosure, especially when you're getting to know someone and falling in love (and they are! they are, dammit!) and someone who is outright lying -- whether it's for a good cause or not. Dom is cagey and non disclosure guy, but Brian is undercover false identity guy. So I don't think dom would ever see himself as having a higher moral ground -- as enraged as he is when he and Brian are facing off after Race Wars, he's more angry about Brian being a cop than about anything else, because he knows damn well he's a criminal and this is a Very Bad Thing for him, and of course in my slashy world, very bad for their potential relationship -- but I do think that he rarely ever places trust in someone, and when it's wrongly placed, that's pretty important to him. I can't blame him for feeling set up and betrayed -- Brian's trust wasn't betrayed, but Dom's was, and Brian had to work it so that Dom *would* trust him and let him into his world. I just don't see it as Angel Brian and Devil Dom -- that's way too simple for me, plus I hate how the pretty guy is always the angel descended from heaven. Gah.

Clarify? Do you mean you think the rest of your concentration on this want sex [g] or the fandom is more interested in the sexy sweaty part?


that fandom is more interested in the sexy sweaty stuff. i don't think they give a shit for the most part about character. i think the ratio of people who do, who want detailed, layered stories is a lot lower than in many fandoms. I'm sure it has a lot to do with 1) very hot guys 2) such obvious, intense slash that can fit into a number of favorite kink scenarios and 3) cars. Cuz cars = sex.

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