Youth recaptured in cereal

[gwyn]

Today's Dinosaur Comics is so very very me. The cereal, the memories of childhood things that disappeared, the obsession with finding out... Ah ha ha ha. I love it.

At least that's a little laughter. I'm just getting more and more down as things go by. I had to send in my IRS form today -- I got audited! Really, that has always been one of my adult-life terrors; the other being body-cavity searched (my other motto in life: never do anything that could potentially result in a body-cavity search). But apparently they needed to know more about my state sales-tax deduction in 2007, which was the year of the kitchen remodel/addition on the house. They allow you to make a spreadsheet if you have too many receipts to send in, which I did. My tax person said that a lot of her clients have had this for the same year; she's actually of the mind that they're just trying to see who'll pay them more money and they don't really care. But it makes me highly nervous, even though I have nothing to hide. I've read so many horror stories about what the IRS does to people... shudder.

I've been doing a lot of marketing for work, which entails things I really hate doing and it just makes me end up feeling like dirt, because it so rarely ends with getting anything or getting potential clients interested. I just took one of the worst editing tests I've ever taken, probably even worse than the Slate copyediting test I took. It was so freaking bizarre. But I did it, just because who knows what they're really looking for, although the phrase "any errors you make will be counted against your score" makes me feel even more nervous.

I also am feeling like I need to rethink whether I can go to VVC. Most people have made their plans for roomies or don't want me rooming with them, and I'm feeling acutely depressed about the situation. I can get the airplane tix for miles, but the room for four nights would be too astronomical to deal with, so I just don't know what to do about it. I feel like it would be wiser to not go and certainly less depressing to not be reminded of how alone I feel, but being in the auction this year kinda makes me feel like I should be there with the vid. I know in the end it doesn't matter, but... it feels that way. Or it just feels bad, whatever.

I'm still a little confused about some of the Dreamwidth stuff, and I know I should sit down and really look at it, but it almost feels too sophisticated for me! I'm like, access/subscribe... wha? So I take it that access is like if you friend someone, who then can read your friends-locked journal page, but how is that different than subscribing? You can just subscribe to someone without them being able to see an flocked post? My brain is still stuck in LJ-land, which I still haven't learned enough about!

Last night there was a police helicopter and a number of silent patrol cars searching for a burglary suspect or home invasion, no one is sure which. It was a little alarming for me because I very well remember the police and the K9 unit in my backyard a couple years ago detaining a car thief and how nerve-wracking that was. I kept looking out the back window, and I wanted to try to get Olive to come inside, but no way in hell was I opening the door, since my garden appears to be a favorite hiding space. After about 45 min. they went away, but I don't know if they caught their ne'er-do-well or not.

Comments

[anoel.livejournal.com]

I really, really hope you come to Vividcon. Have you tried asking any of the people who got in off the waitlist or people posting in the communities for roommates if they have space? Anything is better than nothing.

Access means they can read your friendslocked stuff and suscribe means you read all their posts but they don't have access unless you specifically add them. So basically what you said is right.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I've asked a lot of people I know and they are all booked, or don't seem to want me as an extra. I have no idea who was on the waitlist -- and the posts in the VVC comm have been filled. I didn't want to post publicly because I'd hoped I could find a friend to room with, but that isn't happening.

[morgandawn.livejournal.com]

chache's post on the VVC community is still up, the link is below. I think she may even be local to you?

[kassrachel.livejournal.com]

Oh, I hope you're able to make it to Vividcon!

My sense on the dreamwidth thing is this: if I want to read your journal, I subscribe. If you want me to have access to your filtered posts, you can grant me access; if not, then what will appear on my reading page will simply be your public posts.

By the same token: if you want to read my journal, you subscribe. That means the public posts will appear on your friends list. If I want you to be able to see the private stuff, I grant you access.

Basically, taken together they're the equivalent of "being on someone's friendslist" on lj. The difference (eta: on dreamwidth) is that the two functions are separate. So if there were someone whose posts I enjoyed, but for whatever reason I didn't want her to have access to everything I post, I could subscribe to her journal but not give her access -- that way, everything she posts (which I have permission to see) is on my reading page, but she doesn't automatically get access to my locked posts. (Unlike on lj, where if I "friend" someone, their posts appear on my friendspage and they get automatic access to my friendslocked posts, unless I make a special filter to control who I want to be able to see my locked content.)

Is that helpful?

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I think so. I'm having trouble wrapping my brain around it after all these years of flist stuff. I also think that seeing those red Xs will be more of an opportunity for hurt feelings (like, why won't you subscribe to me, but give me access, or whatever) but I doubt there's anything you can do about the fraughtness of social networking. People keep trying to get me to do meme things on Facebook and I steadfastly refuse, and I think they get irritated at me, but I am just not into FB at all.

[kassrachel.livejournal.com]

Oh, me neither! I have avoided FB like the plague.

My sense is that people I knew in grade school, and in high school, and my cousins, all hang out there. And in truth, I don't want to be in daily contact with those folks, you know? I am deeply delighted that I get to talk to my friends every day on lj (and also on dw, and/or both at once) but I don't want to reconnect with people who knew me when I was a kid, and I especially don't want people who knew me as a kid to intermingle with the friends I've made in fandom these last ten years! omg, that just makes my brain hurt. :-)

[morgandawn.livejournal.com]

I saw chaeche posting she needed a roomate on the VVC community this week.

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

The post is no longer there, which I assume means she found someone. One of many things that continue to make me feel shitty about this whole thing.

::misses rooming with you and hates EDS even more!::

[morgandawn.livejournal.com]

still there
http://community.livejournal.com/vividcon/173062.html?mode=reply - it was locked to members of the community

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

That's really weird. I am a member of the community, and I saw the initial post when I read my friends list a couple days ago, and yet, when I click on it, it tells me I'm not authorized to read it, and I can't see the post when I just view the VVC live journal. And I'm signed in. WTF?

[morgandawn.livejournal.com]

check to see if you're listed a s a member not just a watcher? if you are, let the VVC mods know. \

but I copied the text of her message to you in my earlier reply, so you can contact her direct

[gwyn-r.livejournal.com]

I resubscribed and that seemed to work. Although it came through very oddly. Anyway, I've been in touch with her. Turns out she lives in the same nabe!