They're alive!

[gwyn]

My sister's kitties made it to North Carolina okay. Bear, the very frail one who has the tumor and is so skinny that he is nothing but bones, was pretty wobbly, but they are alive and okay, and that was weighing very heavily on my mind -- I wasn't sure Bear could make the trip in his condition. I'm sure they're upset and frightened, plus I know that this woman has a dog who, though he loves cats, will be a problem for cranky old Mr. Bear, and then poor Baxter takes the brunt of Bear's anger (displacement -- it's not just for humans!), so it becomes both their problem. But the woman who took them knew and loved my sister, and she loves the cats, so I hope that they will be able to adjust okay, and that the stress of adjustment won't be too much for my buddy Bear. Baxter was always a one-woman cat with my sister; he never left her side and when she was gone, he didn't leave my side, but until then he'd never been especially warm to me. Bear was always my buddy, chewing on my head, cuddling next to me under the covers, which I don't even like but it was okay because they needed a friend.

For the whole past weekend I've been unable to breathe -- well, since last week -- and nothing seemed to ease the panic attacks. I know that this has been a big part of it, but all the money issues and things like paying for an exterminator and a furnace duct cleaning and a plumber and all the other things that have been eating away at my money, plus paying for the cats' trip and vet bills, has made me worried about how dad and I are going to get by until some of the estate money comes in so we can pay for all these expenses. Of course, there are plenty of offers from the vultures circling, and one person made an offer on the house, but I asked Dad if we can turn down an offer -- I don't want to sell my sister's house to some sleazebag who found it was for sale by the will being filed. That's obviously some kind of investor who would trash her beautiful place and rent it out, probably to creeps, and I don't want that at all. I had a really weepy day yesterday because of all this, and the person who took the cats not getting in touch with me about it, but once I found out then I got even weepier. My pillow was soaked around my head because I couldn't even stop crying before I fell asleep. For a non-crying person, I'm certainly making up for lost time lately.

At least the vid, even with all the stupid Final Cut problems that I'm going through, is coming along. Already have nearly two minutes completed. It's so weird, and going to be so... weird to people. I think it's going to be like the Buffy equivalent of my old X-Files vid Fall in the Light -- about five people will get it or like it, and the rest will be scratching their heads, going "uh, that's very... interesting. I like that you have Giles in there." (On Fall in the Light, one person said, "It's nice to see Mrs. Scully in a vid." That was pretty much the best people could offer.) But Fall is my favorite of my XF vids, even though few people appreciated it, and one of my favorites out of all my vids -- I like esoteric, obscure lyrics and ethereal music and strange visual styles and non-obvious stories. So sue me. But I know going in ahead of time that it will make most people go "what the fuck?", so that's okay.

Now if I can just get going on my fanfic...

Comments

[maygra.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry this has all been so difficult for you --not just the loss of your siter, which is the worst, but then to have the estate settling become such a huge suck on your energy and emotions as well and on top of that. My mom's estate wasn't so hard to deal with (but she had already sold her house shortly before she died so...no having to mess with mortgage payoffs or trying to sell it.)

I'm glad the kities made it okay.

[kadymae.livejournal.com]

Sorry you are having such a sucktacular stressful day.

[mlyn.livejournal.com]

Oh, thank goodness the kitties are okay. I'll keep my fingers crossed that the money worries ease up soon.

Go vidding! *Waves pompoms*

[kirbyfest.livejournal.com]

I'm glad the kitties are safe.

Regarding the anxiety, have you talked to your doctor about it? It couldn't hurt.

[klia.livejournal.com]

I'm relieved the kitties arrived safely, and glad they're with someone who knows and loves them.

::hugs::

I'm sure I've told you before, but I adore FitL. It's my favorite of your XF vids. I've watched it many, many times, and have never *not* cried.

[mystic-savage.livejournal.com]

I'm glad the cats made it. Will keep a good thought for them.

[fishsanwitt]

Yay for the kitties!

I'm thinking of you :) ::hugs::

[justacat.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm so relieved the cats made it - I found myself worrying about them on and off since your last post .... And my heart aches for you; I can't even imagine how difficult this must be.

{{hugs}}