gwyn: (veronica takethat _jems_)
Wow, very long time since I posted anything besides the last story announcement for [community profile] intoabar. I keep meaning to post, and then I get seized with ennui or pain or just a general feeling that there's too much to handle. Right now, I'm avoiding dealing with the heatwave we're in, and trying to spend a little time in a cooler space even though it's hell on my spine issues.

I had planned to have a year of health catch-up events scheduled, and was doing somewhat okay about it: had my long-delayed followup colonoscopy in March, and that went well and I have now graduated to being able to go five years in between procedures. It helps a lot because they really do a number on me; I've had people constantly dismiss them to me, insisting it's no big deal and implying I'm a baby, but I'm like, you didn't get cancer the first time you did one, so shut up. So being able to go to a five-year schedule is big, and I asked him before the procedure what the odds were that I'd have cancer again and he said, "You won't get cancer again. Now that we know what we know, you have your colonoscopies and if there are polyps, we cut them out before they can become cancerous." So I thought that was interesting. I knew it was usually slow growing, but I hadn't realized quite how much. It's weird, as much as I learned about colon cancer when dealing with it, I don't think I still really knew much about it at all.

Then I had to get my eyes checked, because I have been unable to see clearly for some time and needed new prescriptions. I have really unusual issues so I cannot just get cheap glasses online, and I was waffling for a long time about going to my longtime eye doctor or the new place up the street, but ended up deciding to brave the awful trip downtown to see my regular guy, just because they know all my weird problems. It's been...challenging, nothing is working out right and I'm having to keep going back and I know they're as frustrated as I am. When I made the appointment, they said I hadn't been in since 2017, and I was sure that was wrong--till I realized that oh yeah, that made sense. A few months after my last visit there, I got diagnosed with the colon cancer, so yeah durr, it had been a really long time.

I got one thing that worked out though--he recommended occupational lenses, or computer glasses, and they kept saying their clients always said they were life-changing. I was skeptical, but goddamn, they really are. You're not supposed to see well with distance with them, but I actually do see pretty well, but for the minute detail I have to see, especially when I'm proofreading, they're a game changer. If you have trouble with computer work, I highly recommend giving these glasses a try.

Then I had planned my yearly exam (and last pap test ever! the only thing good about getting old!), and then finding a new dentist since I haven't been since before the pandemic, but I got derailed by yet another skin cancer on my face. So I have to go in next Wednesday and get my face cut up again, and practically bleed to death, and try to get them to give me legit painkillers without treating me like an addict. So excited.

My physical went okay, even with the lecture about my usual high cholesterol and how I'm gonna have a heart attack or stroke. I have always had naturally high bad cholesterol, but it gets worse as I get older. Shrug. I actually don't care. I have no interest in living a long time. I do have a serious sodium problem, though, in that it's really low because I take a diuretic, and that explains my chronic lightheadedness and other issues.

I had no idea that they had developed vaccines for pneumococcus and hepatitis B. It almost made me cry to get the shots for them--I couldn't help thinking of the years I volunteered at an AIDS help organization in the late '80s-90s, and how prevalent hep B was among the patients. How amazing a vaccine could have been then. And I guess there's also one for A, and while C doesn't have one, it does have much better treatment options now. It's a weird thing to get emotional about, but there you are.

I also finally got my car in for servicing, but alas, discovered some big issues to fix, and then I want to get some things addressed on my house, but I'll have to see what happens with the face surgery. That'll be a lot of money. And my regular client is not paying me, and I'm stressing the fuck out about that. I can't tell if he's just being flakey as usual or ghosting me. But I have some really fun upcoming work two great authors, so that's something to look forward to. Also Blues gets his checkup on Monday, and that always ends in him having to have a dental, so...not excited about that. The universe giveth, the universe taketh away.

I am working on the next chapter of Reverie. I dropped off the face of the earth as far as anyone knew after the last chapter, a fucking year ago in August, and I feel so ashamed. I've only written three things since then, all short stuff, and it makes me feel so guilty that the like three people reading it were left hanging.

Then I got a really weird idea for a kind of 616/MCU canon divergent AU that I think is so dumb and odd that it would have an audience of maybe two people, but I can't stop thinking about it, so I need to complete Reverie so I can tackle it.

Anyways, that's mostly it. Just enduring, waiting till our bridge is said to be reopening in September and going to do things outside my neighborhood won't be an hours-long torture affair, and trying not to melt into a puddle of sweat. How's by you?
gwyn: (bumble _hellsbelles)
I shouldn't even be taking the time to post this--Yuletide is still kicking my ass, partly because I keep getting work in as the magazine is trying to rush to beat end of year for an issue that I started working on back in freaking July. I love my assignment, but I keep getting hung up on other stuff, and now there's Christmas to put up, and I'm so behind. I have no doubts I'll finish it maybe tonight or tomorrow, but I want to do significant rewrites and edits, and get nervous whenever I put up unpolished things to meet the deadline and edit later. Especially with the archive being dodgy a lot lately.

This week, I've had the weirdest cold. I started feeling feverish and headachey Saturday night, and by Sunday could tell I was coming down with something. I was pretty upset, because I had waited months for a dermatologist appt. scheduled for Tuesday, and it takes so freaking long to get in even when you have something concerning (there's been this reddish spot on my cheek for a while, and I know not to wait too long but I didn't want to deal with the expense, considering my $8,000 deductible). But then I started feeling not sick, like, I was just congested a little, and achey, had a bit of a thick feeling in my lungs. It just stayed like that, so I thought, well, okay, I don't have a cold, but spent a lot of time in bed and slept a little more when I could.

Felt middling on Tuesday, so went in. She found three suspicious spots and removed them with the cauterizing thing for biopsy, and ugh, god, it hurrrrts. The one on my cheek possibly most of all because the anesthetic shot was right below my eye and the area is very swollen plus itchy. The one on my arm isn't terrible, but it's oozy, and the one on my back is impossible to see and so I'm trying to put bandages on in reverse in the mirror while trying to get it on the spot, and keep getting the adhesive on the wound. Annoying and painful. But at least this time they believed me when I told them how much I bleed, so they covered things well enough I didn't ooze blood all the way home while I'm sitting in terrible traffic and can't do anything.

It was time to get my blood work done, too, for the cancer checkup, and she had to go in my hand this time because I was so shaky and kind of...blanched by the biopsy spots. So now my hand hurts, my back hurts, and my cheek really hurts, it's so fun. Adventures in health care. I'm...actually pretty scared about what this will cost, especially if anything turns out to require surgery. When I had the Moh's surgery two years ago, I had excellent insurance and a small deductible that had already been met because of the cancer. Now I've got this...travesty, and I have a bad feeling I'll have a gofundme in my future. Blech.

Anyway, the weird thing was that I still felt sick this whole week after that, and I really hope I didn't infect anyone. It's just been the strangest cold, and I got mild food poisoning on Wednesday, which didn't help. I've definitely had much, much worse food-borne illness, but it was still one of the more intense cases I've had, and that's a very strange situation when you're already having this weird cold-but-not-a-cold.

I had a great time with [personal profile] minim_calibre on our girls weekend. The spa was lovely, and I found a bowl at the antique mall so I can try that peasant bread recipe a few of you have raved about (I have a lot of vintage Pyrex, but none in the shape and sizes the bread recipe mentions). And Knives Out was a total hoot, and I loved seeing Chris in his cozy, ratty sweaters, though I'm deeply amused it's become such a weird phenomenon. We went afterward for a drink to discuss it, because I had a tough time following the "donut hole within the donut hole" resolution, especially since people were laughing so much and it was an incredibly small theatre. I really would love to see it again--I missed a few things because people moving about (they bring stuff to your seat there) or whacking my head, plus it was just so much fun. I can't wait to see Ana de Armas again in the new Bond movie.

Is it stupid to get holiday cards close to the holiday? I honestly don't know if I have enough time to do cards until after Yuletide is due, but that puts it really close to the holiday. I don't know. I don't want to be one of those people who mail them out after Christmas, but at this rate they could arrive on like Christmas Eve or something. As it is, I can only manage about one holiday thing a day, so there's precious little holiday cheer here.

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